losing the war...

tonight she told me why she is leaving me. She said that she is afraid that we were going to buy a house together and I would kick her out and then she would have nothing. she would rather live alone in the trailer park than risk that. She said that she wanted to do it now, because if she waited until her father dies than nobody would be there to support her. it's not her idea, you see, it's still mine she just wants to protect herself, JUST IN CASE i were to ever leave her. So, i am now getting a divorce JUST IN CASE.

Is that perfectly clear? JUST IN CASE

About a month ago I started having chest pains accompanied by shortness of breath and numbness in my left arm. Um, Hello? I'm 32 years old and I'm having a Heart Attack?
A day of testing later and guess what? No, I'm not. Panic attacks. Fucking Panic Attacks. She is killing me, JUST IN CASE I might leave her.

Well, I have two fucking words:
Self-fulling Phophecy

(That counts as 2, right?)


If anybody has a suggestion as to how to fucking get my life back, please let me know...



JHO